What To Watch: Mondays

Fall TV Season is finally upon us, and the season premieres of returning shows and pilots for new shows will start hitting the air soon. I'll be doing a brief rundown, day by day, of the shows I'll be watching this fall, so follow along and add your two cents worth as well. Let's start with Monday:

Show	Net	Day	Time	Priority
Heroes	NBC	MON	800	DVR
House	FOX	MON	800	Watch
How I Met Your Mother	CBS	MON	800	Watch
Lie to Me	FOX	MON	900	DVR
Big Bang Theory	CBS	MON	930	Watch
Castle	ABC	MON	1000	Watch

First, a quick word about what I'm calling "Priority." "DVR" means that I'll TiVo the show, probably get around to watching it, but not necessarily on the night in question. "Watch" means that I'll make every effort to watch the show live (or relatively live, factoring in the 15 minute or so buffer to blast through the commercials). And my third classification (which isn't shown here on Monday) is "Sleepytime." Long ago having tired of the shouty nonsense from SportsCenter anchors and news program hysterical blathering, I like to have a bank of shows built up on the bedroom TiVo to watch as I'm falling asleep. Typically, these are fairly unchallenging but watchable procedurals. Also, my "best of the night" are shown in RED.

Heroes: Call it morbid curiosity or a bad habit, but I'm leaving this on the season pass list despite a continuing (and almost terminal) decline in the quality of the show. Mainly, I like Adrian Pasdar, Jack Coleman and Zachary Quinto as actors, and for the time being, their talents and appeal overcome the charisma void created by the rest of the cast and the plot hole-riddled scripting. Could have the plug pulled in short order if it doesn't improve quickly, though.

House: How has Hugh Laurie not been awarded an Emmy yet? The quality of the individual episodes and plot strands can vary, but there's no doubting the ferocious, multi-faceted and captivating central performance (along with quality work done by the rest of the cast, especially the understated Robert Sean Leonard).

How I Met Your Mother: When's the last time you were so entertained by a show built around a douchey principal character and his uninteresting quest? But the other four characters are so awesome we put up with Ted.

Lie To Me: Like House, the show's plot mechanics can be a bit of a one trick pony, but the lead English import is so damned good, it makes up for it. They did start to show different nuances to the "lie detection" gimmick late in the season, and bringing in Shawn Ryan as showrunner, and Sarah Fain & Elizabeth Craft (late of Dollhouse) as writers should only help the show improve in its sophomore season.

Big Bang Theory: Simply put, my favorite sitcom on TV. BBT grew leaps and bounds in its second season, continuing all the lovably geeky stuff (spot on, while treating it with respect - a difficult tightrope to walk) that made it so appealing in the first place, while rounding out and deepening the initially one-note and troublesome character of Penny. Proof that the "old" three camera sitcom format isn't dead, and can thrive in the right hands.

Castle: Nathan Fillion gets his best role since Captain Tightpants, and has terrific chemistry with stealth hottie Stana Katic in this engaging, breezy, crime drama. Castle feels like it should be on USA network, and that's actually a good thing. (And bonus points for giving me the first kid on TV since Rory Gilmore that I don't want to put into a wood chipper).

Season Finale Haiku

Chuck
"Guys. I know kung fu!"
Happily, not the last words,
We will hear Chuck say.

Lost
Not all black and white.
Lots of secrets to Un-Locke.
Kate still fucks it up.

Bones
What the hell was that?
Babies, brain tumors and sex?
I want amnesia.

How I Met Your Mother
Mom is in the class?
Don't care since we have Barney,
Robin and Aldrins.

Terminator: The Sarah Connor Chronicles
Goodbye, smart sci-fi.
Loved the cast, and this John C,
Won't scream at DP.

American Idol
"Golden Idols" suck,
Homophobia clouds vote,
Kara fun at last.

House
Hallucination?
Only good cuz of Cutthroat.
Hugh still awesome, though.

Dollhouse
Wash is a badass.
Love for Adelle knows no bounds.
Bring on season 2.

Battlestar Galactica
All just chess pieces,
Cuz god did it all along.
Where did Starbuck go?

Fringe
Dimension doorway,
Hey look! It's Spock! Walter rocks.
Peter spry for dead.

Desperate Housewives
Please, Dave, kill Susan.
Did anything fun happen?
Why do I still watch?

The Office
God no! Not babies!
Always kills a show for me.
Picnics are awkward.

Supernatural
Heaven has cold beer.
And burgers. Angels are dicks.
Ruby can't act. Bye!

24
Kim and no cougar.
Red is hot and goes Jack-side.
Quiet end. Good day.

Heroes
More lame upon lame.
Put B. Fuller on GOOD show.
Cast can't save plotting.

I'll take potpourri for $5,700, Alex

The deleted Twilight scene. Ha!

The 10 Ugliest baseball unis of the 70s. Shield your eyes.

10 Funniest Freudian slips on TV. It's a good watch, and all the clips are short and to the point. (Trivia: the lovely lady who says "cock" in #5 is the wife of the current NFL commissioner).

TV Guides claims these are the 20 greatest TV catchphrases.

The best minor league baseball promotion ever. Matt Foley would be proud.

Bryan Fuller fesses up about why Heroes blew. (Blows?)

Oh, Boy! Scott Bakula talks about the 20th anniversary of Quantum Leap. (And who knew that Chuck's General Beckman was married to Enterprise's Doctor Phlox?)

I twittered this, but it's too funny not to reference again: Joe Cocker. Translated with subtitles.

Iowa uses common sense, and some conservatives think it's hard to be "Christian" in public now. So sorry about the potential public scorn directed at bigotry. Sullivan reacts here. The American Spectator calls equal marriage rights "a hill to die on." And what does this mean, politically, to the evangelical right?

100 classic movie lines in 200 seconds.

10 characters Zooey Deschanel should have played.

First Taun Taun sleeping bags, and now this? Why wasn't I a geek child in this era?

Why didn't he just pray, and have god magically fix it so he doesn't look like an al dente noodle in a windstorm in slow motion?

Chicago Trib looks at why NCIS is so appealing. It's weird, I feel the same way. I was looking for an "easy" procedural to watch when I was going to bed, and my TiVo recommended NCIS. I had never given it much thought, but started watching thanks to the USA repeats, and next thing you know, I had seen every episode. At first, you're a little nonchalant and incredulous. How long will Ducky's stories go on? How much can Gibbs glower? What's with the boat in the basement? Is Tony going to shamelessly flirt and quote movies in every episode? Is McGee Neo? Israeli to English doesn't really result in those kinds of malaprops, does it? Is this the sunniest and least hardcore goth chick ever? But after a while, you just come to welcome these characters onto your TV. Yeah, it's kind of square, but oddly addicting.

Zap2It looks at 10 good questions in preparation for tonight's Lost (though I don't think we'll get them all answered, of course).

10 "Wives Tales" debunked.

It's not lupus (and other musings)

Okay, if it's not lupus, then what is ailing House? TWOP has a handy top 10 list, which you can view here. I still tune in every week, but I'm just not enjoying it as much as I have in the past. Is it show fatigue? Personally, I don't think so. I watch a lot of procedurals, and I don't really mind the "case of the week," patient of the week," "crook of the week" or "monster of the week" format. With a show like House, you tune in because you know what you're going to get: a couple of bad diagnoses, patient almost dying, House insulting everyone, exasperated Cuddy, snappy dialogue, some Wilson humanity, everybody lies, patient cured. Rinse, repeat. I do admire the chances the show has taken in the past to try to shake things up, but the results have been a mixed bag. I liked Stacy. Hated Vogler. Hated Tritter. Liked Lucas the PI. Loved the "Survivor" competition. Loved Cutthroat Bitch, and thought the show ended beautifully last season. But this season has been kind of "blah."

TWOP's list hits on many of my frustrations. Adding a baby is never, ever a good idea. I don't care. I've never liked Foreman, and get bored every time he's on the screen. Olivia Wilde is a good actress, dead sexy and I'm glad that she's going to be in the Tron 2.0 movie. But I don't give a damn about Thirteen. So what could make that worse? Pair up Foreman and Thirteen! And have them suck the oxygen out of half the show each week! Yeesh. I still watch, but each week it's more out of a hope of a return to form, than a real anticipation. C+

Quickies on a few other shows:

Nip/Tuck. The show has always run on an undercurrent of inspired camp lunacy, but good lord what's happened to lately? Christian and Liz? Really? And the less said about Eden and Colleen the better. Possibly worth watching: guest turns coming up for Katee Sackhoff and Rose McGowan (and a check of IMDB shows that they'll be playing the same character. Huh?) D+

Heroes. Okay, we all know we've been on a slippery slope since the craptacular S1 finale. Can anyone keep track of how many times Sylar or Nathan have changed sides and motivations? And is there a worse actor on TV than Milo Ventimiglia? The most recent "volume" started last week, but I think the show may have already done too much damage, with ridiculous plot holes, inconsistent application of powers, cardboard performances and flat writing rolling downhill and building up steam. Bryan Fuller, late of a far, far better show, Pushing Daisies, has returned to the writing/producing team on Heroes, but his effect won't be felt until later this year. Will it be too late? Personally, I think they should junk all the bad characters and bad actors, and just keep Nathan, Sylar and HRG and start over. (And if you want to see Adrian Pasdar on something good, watch Profit. It's on TV occasionally, and on DVD. A great show, killed before it's time). C-

Big Love has come back strong this year, with intriguing storylines all about. I'm usually not a fan of shows that heavily features kids and families, but there's just something about the quality of this one that sucks me in. The performances from the three primary "sister wives" are all extraordinary, and I'm intrigued by the possible addition of a fourth wife to the mix. A

Bones. Something has just been "off" this season. The whole ridiculousness with Zack last year didn't do the show any favors, but that's not it, as I've actually liked the rotating cast of whack jobs they've had replacing him (English trivia guy is my favorite). Maybe it's just that the fine line between "realistic" crime solving and character based shenanigans has expanded too far to tonally accept. The chemistry between Booth and Bones is there as always, of course, but last week's ep with return of the Gravedigger was a blown opportunity. A ghost? You're kidding, right?! Didn't they just have a hallucinated character a few episodes ago, and then they do that again? Or was this supposed to be a "real" ghost? I mean, the ghost did "hand" Booth things in the ship, and then there was that WTF ending where Bones actually interacted with the "ghost." What the hell was that? And the less said about the circus episode the better (though Emily Deschanel in the knife throwing assistant getup is always welcome on my screen). C

Burn Notice. Just keeps doing what it does. Fun, frothy tales of espionage in Miami, with healthy helpings of spycraft how to and Bruce Campbell. A

Life on Mars. They made a HUGE mistake with their return from hiatus episode. When we last saw the show, it ended on a bit of a cliffhanger, with Sam receiving a strange call imploring him to go into the basement. When we come back, we get an out of sequence ep that didn't even address that plot development (though seeing Johnny Sack play another cop was fun, and I like the twist about Sam sleeping with the lovely Maggie Siff -- Rachel from Mad Men -- who turns out to be Hunt's daughter). Then, the next week, we do pick up the plot with the basement, adding some intrigue. The ratings are cratering, though, and the show is surprisingly not holding on to much of Lost's lead-in. I like the show, but I don't think it's long for this world, sadly. B

Supernatural. The season started off brilliantly, with Dean returning from Hell and the addition of badass "angels" to the mix and mytharc. Then, we had a few standalone MOTW episodes, including one that seemed like an equally disturbing homage to the X-Files classic "Home" and another entitled "Criss Angel is a Douche Bag." How can you not love that? Thursday's eppy, "Sex and Violence," was dark, twisted, funny and surprising. A great, underrated show. A

I'll take potpourri for $4,200, Alex

Okay, I'll admit it. I had these as a kid. But sadly, I was too young to have someone in a Leia metal bikini to roll around them with me.

A Horrible gift to give. And I may have sent this to someone who hasn't yet experienced the magic.
Speaking of which, here's a completely unbiased review of the DVD.

Jane Espenson says chillax, everything's fine on Dollhouse. And FOX execs talk Dollhouse, among other things. And someone else who has seen the new pilot. An interview with the lovely and talented Amy Acker. Part 1. Mark Sheppard, of BSG, The Middleman, Firefly and Dollhouse and many other things, has an interview here. And another great video interview here.

The Periodic Table of Awesome.

Say what you will about his efforts on MNF, but Uncle Tony is great on the radio. Sadly, he won't be returning to that medium for a while.

I didn't need to read the rest of the article. I was hooked at the headline.

Who wants to work in the Death Star or the Enterprise?

Because really, that's where you go to find the best and brightest.

SlingBox on your CrackBerry? Should we go ahead and add the CrackBerry to Maslow's hierarchy?! And then there's this. Wow. that's a tough choice. With the CrackBerry, at least I can get it anywhere, anytime and for a long as I want. And I don't have to worry about catching a "virus" or spawning small, expensive and noisy BlackBerries.

Advisors suggest Sam Bradford -- and Matt Stafford -- should stay in school another year.

Check out the last item here. Damn, someone's not a Mark Richt fan.

What's Carly Smithson been up to? Still love her.

Read through the first few pages of this recap of the Heroes "volume" finale. Of the myriad problems with the show, characterization is first and foremost, as you'll see.

Sarah Michelle Gellar's Maxim outtakes. Time for a cold shower.

Sent to me by a former honey. Guess she knows me, huh?

Visitors to Bryant-Denny will now get in the proper mindset. Brilliant.

More ridiculous Batman 3 rumors. But I like this one. Meow.

Obviously, kids inspire bloodlust.

This should be posted in every office breakroom.

21 unnecessary sequels that were great anyway.

Mo Ryan's Top 10 shows of 2008. An excellent list, including the "runners up."

TV shows that more people should have watched. Yeah! for 7, 6, 5, 2 and 1. And The Middleman should be on that list, too.

The Big O really represents "change," eh? I made a note of this earlier in the week when it was first announced, and since then it's blown up into a big -- and legitimate -- controversy. Flat earth, theocratic politics as usual. Inclusive my ass. Why is this even necessary, particularly with someone so bigoted and intellectually dim? Of course, Hitchens has a take.

Say what you will Barry, but here's an interesting look at the development of his logo.

Robin was right about "entertainment" north of the border.

Lost complaints from the future, and other geeky news

The blogging around these parts has been a bit sporadic of late. Real life has been a tad odd and intrusive, and promises to be moreso in the coming days. However, here are a few interesting geeky tidbits from around the intertubes to share:

From the new Lost DVD: producers Damon and Carlton report "from the future" on the anti-Lost backlash. (This was shown at Comic-Con this summer. Funny stuff).

The new Terminator: Salvation trailer is up on iTunes. Count me among the skeptics who didn't have faith that the guy responsible for Charlie's Angels could deliver a badass Terminator movie. But this new footage? Pretty damned awesome. I09 breaks down the footage shot-by-shot.

Kristin Bell, bloody and quite soon to be dead on the set of Heroes, doing crossword puzzles. Be still my heart.

An obscure license plate from my area, that makes me want to do the "dance of joy." See if you get it.

Joss says he would put Dollhouse on Friday, too. Plus, "7 trouble signs for Dollhouse."

Time's Top 10 TV Series of 2008. Notable, and completely correct, inclusions: Mad Men, Dr. Horrible's Sing-Along Blog, Lost, Battlestar Galactica, Chuck. Missing: Dexter. Also, the Top 10 Episodes of 2008. Number 1 on their list is also number 1 on mine: Lost's "The Constant."

Wow, this sounds interesting. Has anyone read the source material?

The BSG webisodes start tomorrow! Sadly, I won't be near a computer all day, and won't catch the premiere until much later.

New Watchmen trailer on iTunes. Go find it.

The Robot Chicken creators asked Ron Moore and Joss Whedon for a job.

And yesterday, I was meeting with the general manager of a corporate dining establishment, and we were talking about various promotions for their patrons. He said that for a couple of weeks, they put a sign just above the salad bar that said "The secret of the universe? 42." Now that is just truly and magnificently geeky. They had a "prize" that they were going to give to the first few people that asked about it, but unbelievably, no one did.

Noooooo!!! Yessssssss!!!

ABC's Grim Reaper made the rounds on Thursday, swinging his scythe down on Pushing Daisies, Dirty Sexy Money and Eli Stone.

Despite the subject matter and the occasional political preachiness, I enjoyed Stone, but the true gut-punch here is the loss of Daisies, which was the most inventive, charming, literate and laugh out loud funny show I've seen in ages. I wasn't on board from the very beginning (fuck you Comcast), but quickly got sucked into the wonderful world of the pie-maker, and watching this delightful and different show was a highlight for the week. Once the DVDs come out, Pushing Daisies will occupy a place of honor on my shelf next to another of Bryan Fuller's brilliant (and canceled too soon) creations, Wonderfalls.

The rumors around the TV watercoolor are that Fuller, if the fate of Daisies was sealed, would move back to Heroes. Lord knows that show could use his deft touch. In fact, if I was NBC, I would give Tim Kring the bum's rush out the fucking door and install Fuller as show-runner ASAP. Did anyone else read about Kring's latest idiotic statements? At a writing conference recently, he asserted that serialized shows are more difficult for people to follow in this era of DVRs. Huh? That's the most counter-intuitive and stupid thing I've ever heard. DVRs make it soooo much EASIER for people to follow Lost and BSG and Dexter and Mad Men and serialized shows now. If you can't make this week's ep in real time to follow the ongoing plotlines...HELLO!.... you can catch up because you have the episodes saved to watch at your leisure. In fact, lots of folks I know save up weeks and weeks of 24 to watch them all unfold back to back. Sheesh. And this guy is running a "flagship" show, albeit into the ground? Put Fuller in charge, like now.

RIP, Daisies. If only HBO or Showtime had the pie-maker's magic touch to bring you back. (If that was the case, and Pushing Daisies remained "alive" for more than 60 seconds, perhaps The Hills and Hannity and Colmes could die in your place to balance the cosmic equation).

But speaking of brilliant, funny shows euthanized before their time, it appears there's life for the Arrested Development movie. Yeeeeahhhh!

First, kill Mohinder

I was initially on the Heroes bandwagon. It was nice to see someone bring the superhero mythos to the small screen. Sure, it had been done before, with known characters (Adam West's camp-fest Batman) and those created for the tube (such as poofy-haired theme song, Greatest American Hero). You could even argue that Buffy and Angel were sideways takes on the superhero, wrapped in the supernatural. But this was a genre show that put its geek aspirations right in the damned title, and sought to create an original lineup of "heroes," even if the superpowers and storylines were a bit familiar (if charitable) or derivative (if not so charitable).

The first season mostly delivered, with a couple of slices of top shelf television ("String Theory" and "Company Man"), before fizzling out with one of the most disappointing season finales I can remember. The less said about the strike-shortened terrible second season, the better (though anytime Kristen Bell is on my TV, it's is a good thing).

So now we find ourselves in the midst of the third season. Ratings are down considerably and the show has lost some of its cultural cache and buzz. Granted, the show has improved over last season (not a very high bar to jump), but it's still not on solid footing creatively. Yeah, I still watch, but Heroes has gone from "must watch live" to "I'll watch it later Monday night after catching up on Sarah Connor and Chuck" to "oh, that's in the Now Playing list, I guess I'll watch it." EW just did a cover story on the show, and how to fix it. I agree with many of their findings and recommendations. Here's my take:

Thin the herd.
I appreciate the attempts of S3 to quicken the pace and keep things moving. However, there are just too many new and old characters to care about. Marked for death in the TNRLM reaper's ledger: Mohinder. I know, the ladies like him because he's hot. Hell, I have my own set of Heroes eye-candy, too (Claire, Claire's real mom, Elle, and Daphne, to name a few). But the ponderous voice overs, Cronenberg Fly rip-off plot and shallow acting doesn't really add that much. And Maya? Dear god. Not only is that one of the lamest superpowers ever (my eyes get black and kill everyone!), but no one's going to be polishing an Emmy for that performance. Niki/Jessica/Whatever. I didn't care about the stripper, and I don't care about the mistress of ice cubes political handler. Peter. First, he was wimpy and confused. Then, he was waaaaay too powerful. Then, he was trapped in a caricature of an Irish mob movie. Finally, he's been de-powered, but the fact remains that I loathed him on Gilmore Girls, and I loathe him now. Buh-bye. Parkman. I actually like Greg Grunberg, and find him a talented actor, but his plot has gone nowhere. Why doesn't he read minds with everyone he comes in contact with?

Stop with the time travel.
Yeah, it's a cool power. Yeah, it can fuel plot twists. But it's just too damned much. And worst of all, they don't seem to have an internal logic about how it works. Lost, for example, has "time travel" plotlines, but they've worked out a logic and methodology that actually makes sense, is easily understandable, and they stick to it. With Heroes, sometimes it works. Sometimes, it doesn't. They throw out "butterfly effect" explanations, but abandon them when it's inconvenient. It's a limitless power, but too many people have/had it and it's inconsistently applied. Just stop.

Stop using the world "abilities."
If this was a drinking game, we'd all have engorged livers.

Abandon the "formula to give everyone powers" plot.
The 4400 already did this, and did this better.

Make death count.
How many people have died and come back? Hell, I've lost count. Virtually every genre show has had the "shocking death" and return (including top tier programs like Buffy and Angel) but it reaches ludicrous levels with Heroes. Just off the top of my head, we've seen Sylar, Claire, HRG, Ando, Adam, Linderman, Nathan, Niki, Peter and others all "die," only to come back in one form or another. If everyone does it, it loses its power to shock, move and surprise.

Put the best actors front and center.
Heroes has a telegenic and appealing cast, but they're not all blessed with the same acting talent. Give the meaty stuff to the actors who can pull it off: Adrian Pasdar, Robert Forster, Jack Coleman, Kristen Bell, Zachary Quinto, Christine Rose, Malcolm McDowell.

Stop making the characters stupid to service stupid plot points.
Nathan, the conniving politico, finds god because he survives an assassination attempt and sees Linderman? In a world he knows is populated by people with awesome superpowers? Really? Hiro is told expressly not to open the safe, and then he does, only to lose a game-changing formula? And can't go back in time 5 minutes to NOT open the safe? Peter does....well....Peter does just about anything that Peter does. STUPID. Shows like Buffy and Lost have characters operating in a world with extraordinary circumstances, unnatural powers and twisty plot machinations, but they all behave in a way that is true to the characters.

Save the logic, save the show!

I'm still watching, but unless some of the nonsense stops, and stops soon, I probably won't be for much longer. I could go on, but that's my short list. What's yours?

TV Quickies

Random thoughts on the Fall TV Season:

Newly minted Emmy Winning Best Drama Mad Men returned Sunday night with a fantastic episode. I started writing a long treatise on the sad, urine-stained career arc of Freddy Rumson, the meaning of a “name,” Roger Sterling’s end of the episode surprise and Betty Draper’s desperate housewife days, but realized that a couple of professional critics had already done the job quite well. Check out some thoughtful examinations of “Six Month Leave” here and here.

It’s sad that the ratings for Terminator: The Sarah Connor Chronicles are cratering. I think this season has been even better than the last, and Monday’s eppy with a look at Cameron’s story was fascinating, and very well acted by Summer Glau. Rumors addressed here.

Dexter returned Sunday night, and Jimmy Smits will be a welcome addition to the cast. All the elements that make this show a must-watch are there, though I hope the writers don’t feel compelled to make Dex’s latest victim a total scumbag in order to give our serial killer an easy, moral “out.” If the Sopranos and Mad Men and Deadwood have shown us anything, it’s that intelligent audiences will stick with a compelling character that operates outside the boundaries of traditional morality. One major complaint, though. The end of episode reveal introduced something that is typically a “show killer” for me. Why? Can’t even a show about a serial killer stay away from this? Gah.

Heroes season 3 is still an incomprehensible mess, plot-wise. (Examples: if future Peter can travel in time, why shoot Nathan? Why not just tell him what happens if he makes his reveal last year? Or transport him someplace else, away from the media? And if you have mastery over time, why let any of this happen in the first place? Same with Hiro. Why not go back BEFORE he let “the formula” get out of the safe?). Still, for the time being I’ll keep watching, if only because I find some of the characters and performances (HRG, Daphne, Sylar, Hiro, Nathan, Elle, Angela, Claire’s mom) entertaining. At least they’ve picked up the pace of the stupidity this year. Oh, and check out Jack Coleman’s (HRG) blog on TWOP. Much better than the show.

And here’s a funny take on how to grade Heroes episodes on a curve.

Anyone else digging Fringe? I really like it, and think the interplay between the three leads is amusing. And any chance for John Noble's character to talk about cocaine, LSD, root beer floats and cows is fine with me.

Still on board with the quirky detective on House.

I'll take potpourri for $2,600, Alex

Remember "Wendy & Lisa" from Prince's band? They're now doing the music for Heroes. Here's an interview. (and they're BSG fans, as everyone should be).

Wil Wheaton links to a fantastic article about the glory days of Atari. Today's video games have too many damned buttons (okay, I'm old) and I fondly recall the joy of the Atari 2600. And yeah, I had just bout every game mentioned there.

An AV Club writer gets on the Watchmen bandwagon, for the first time. Money Quote: "Watchmen is such a monumental achievement that it makes Moby Dick look like a flaming pile of horseshit by comparison."

I think I need one of these for rainy days.

Tony Bennett, Joe Montana recoil in horror as the Empire invades San Francisco.

Warp drive may be a possibility. Now accepting applications for the United Federation of Planets.

Could there be a Veronica Mars movie? Hey, Serenity got made, so why not.

She's always been considered one of DC Comics "big three" (along with Supes and Batman). But "gender equity" issues aside, does Wonder Woman really work?

Jenna Fischer not "hot enough" to play Sydney Bristow? I love Jennifer Garner, but damn, Jenna's plenty sexy.

Another great interview with Mark Sheppard (Firefly, BSG -- and soon to be on both Dollhouse and The Middleman!) Love this guy.

"You got peanut butter in my chocolate..."

"...no, you got chocolate in my peanut butter."

Saw this tidbit about S3 of Heroes on EW this morning:

Question: What is up with Kristen Bell and Heroes? It’s been ages since we’ve heard anything. Steven
Ausiello: She's back on the set shooting her multi-episode arc as we speak! Woo-hoo! In other Heroes news, look for the action (or at least part of the action) to shift to a comic book shop in Athens, Georgia around Episode 11.

Don't you love it when three of your interests come together? Not quite the perfect syzygy of having a UGA transfer student looking for Cylons on the campus of UC Sunnydale, but I appreciate the forthcoming geeky shout out to the motherland.

Sadly, I think episode 11 may run too late in the real football season for a subplot where Sylar opens up Phil Fulmer's skull on October 11th, only to be disappointed when he doesn't find any brains to eat.

More tidbits from Comic-Con

Nothing like waking up to a Reader full of juicy, geeky goodness. Here ya go:

Six awesome new Watchmen posters. Make sure to look at 'em all, because they're that good. Everyone else as excited about this flick as I am? I had my doubts at first when I heard they were making a movie, because I didn't feel it would be possible to put the entire thing on screen in the time allotted for a theatrical release (which could run as much as 3 hours, and potentially longer on the DVD). I thought an epic 8 to 12 hour miniseries on Showtime or HBO would be the way to go, but Zack Snyder's faithfulness to the original tome gives me hope.

Heroes screens the first hour of the season premiere. All I can say is that they got some makin' up to do, after that last season. If we spend hours wandering around Mexico with Maya and her dark eyes of doom, I might just hit "delete this season pass." SPOILERS from that footage.

Interview with The Middleman.

Not much in the way of revelations, but for all the Losties out there:

• Summary of the Q&A and "prizes" for the Qers.
• Another Q&A wrap up, along with video. Including NEW "Marvin Candle" footage (some dude from Ann Arbor, Michigan? I wonder if he's helping pay off Coach Rich Rod's contract?)
• More vids.

The Sarah Connor Chronicles will pick up next season just a few minutes after Cameron's vehicle 'spolded. More here.

Speaking of Terminators, I certainly wasn't filled with confidence when I heard they were making a 4th movie, brought to us by "the director of Charlie's Angels!" However, getting the late Stan Winston on board for design work and casting Christian Bale as an adult John Connor helps. I'm willing to give it a chance, and its seems like they're taking it seriously. Check out some coverage here (big ass T-600!) and here (more big ass T-600!).

No, we didn't learn the identity of the final Cylon at the BSG panel. But you can find lots of Galactica goodness here and here and here, and Eric Stoltz from Caprica, here.

Get your fill of all things on Joss's new show:

• Video interview of Dollhouse's Joss, Eliza and Tahmoh.
• Quick video interviews with Eliza and Joss.
• Summary of Dollhouse panel.
• Another summary of the panel.
• Summary of a Dollhouse set visit.
• The man himself posts on whedonesque about shooting a new pilot for Dollhouse. Is this Firefly redux? He doesn't seem to think so.

The 50 Greatest Television Shows of All Time

Empire, the UK's preeminent entertainment magazine (and really, one of the best out there period) just published a list of the 50 Greatest Television Shows of All Time. While it has a certain British sensibility, and includes several shows many of us in The Colonies haven't seen, it is a solid list and one that deserves comment. So open up another tab in your browser, and follow along with me as I count (most of) them down.

Nice to see some love for Quantum Leap

Would not put Prison Break in the Top 50. Or Top 250.

Veronica's best episode is NOT the S2 finale. And I might put it higher on the list.

DS9's best ep would be "Far Beyond the Stars," Trials and Tribbilations" or "In the Pale Moonlight."

Nice to see Farscape love, too. I would put it higher than 45. I would have never believed I could take seriously a show that featured muppets as aliens, but damned if it didn't work, thanks to inventive scripting and downright sizzling performances by Ben Browder and Claudia Black.

Star Trek at 43? Kidding, right? Dammit, Jim, that's too low!

Band of Brothers. Cool. I hate the way I finally got around to watching this one, though.

For Star Trek: TNG, they rightly named "Best of Both Worlds (Parts I and II)" as the best ep, though I would put "Yesterday's Enterprise" just a notch below that one.

Alias that high? Above 3 Treks and Farscape? I liked Alias, but not that much.

Deadwood at 31. Ahhh, dearly departed Deadwood. I realize there was more to Deadwood's demise than the creation of the trippy, challenging and ultimately frustrating John From Cincinnati, but I would have easily forgone that for one more season with Al Swearingen. And an average of 1,000 "fucks" per 12 episode season? That's 83 "fucks" per episode. That's fucking awesome, fuckers.

Love that Dexter made the list.

Bender on Futurama is named after Judd Nelson's character in the Breakfast Club? Cool.

Nice choice with Angel at 21. Numfar does the dance of joy. And of course, I would have it higher.

Scrubs at 19? Wha? Huh? I mean, I liked Scrubs for a while, until it became all about kids, but 19?

Best. Sitcom. Ever. Arrested Development at 18. Sweet, but it should be even higher.

South Park is still as funny today as it was when it premiered.

Heroes at 15? Has anyone watched season 2? Although I will agree with them about "Five Years Gone." I still have that ep saved on the TiVo, even after all this time.

Firefly at 14! Shiny! How do you pick a "best" episode here? "Out of Gas" is a very solid and obvious choice, though I'm also partial to the more existential "Objects in Space" (Jubal Early is a fantastic creation) and "Shindig" never fails to crack me up. And that's not even mentioning "Our Mrs. Reynolds" with the duplicitous and adorable YoSaffBridge.

Frak Yeah. BSG at 13. Too Low? So Say We All. And for my take on the best episode (and hell, ALL the episodes), check out this Very Special Edition of TNRLM's "The Canon"

Hard to argue with Seinfeld at 11, but I still put Arrested Development as the best sitcom ever, a c-hair ahead of this show and Cheers.

Now we're in the Top 10, with the X-Files at 9. Despite some hits and misses (mostly the unsatisfying wrap up and faltering under its own weight mythology), this still ranks as one of the best shows of all time. Best episode? They cite "Jose Chung," which might be worthy, but there are so many to consider, like "Clyde Bruckman's Final Repose," "Bad Blood" and many others, including "Home" (check out the Did You Know blurb at the bottom for the surprising origin of that story).

Never watched The Wire. Dunno. Just no interest.

24 at 6? I love watching Jack Bauer whoop some terrorist (or bystander) ass with the best of 'em, but as Gob Bluth would say...."Come On!"

Lost checks in at 5. Given my obsession with the show (I just received 2 "Dharma" and one "Oceanic Air" t-shirts I ordered last weekend), I can't argue with that one. Another show that's tough to pick a best episode. What about "Walkabout?" Or last season's finale, "Through The Looking Glass?" Or this season's "The Constant?"

You woke up this morning. Got yourself a gun. Mama always said you'd be the chosen one. Or at #3. "Long Term Parking" is indeed a fine episode, but "Pine Barrens" is a fucking masterpiece.

I'm fond of The Simpsons, and it certainly has had a significant cultural impact and impressive staying power. That's their choice for number 1. However, speaking of "The Chosen One," my choice for number 1 would be Empire's choice for number 2. The answer, of course, is the television masterpiece Buffy The Vampire Slayer. If you are still scared by the silly title, you're really missing out (much like I assume some folks are by Battlestar Galactica) and owe it to yourself to go buy all seven seasons on DVD right now. Trust me, you won't regret it. Or, if you like, you can do a little sampling at hulu.com. And then you'll go buy all seven seasons on DVD. I'll even get you started right now:

As for the "best" episode of Buffy? You can check out this other Very Special Edition of TNRLM's "The Canon" right here.

As you can tell, I don't have that many quibbles with the list overall, despite the omission of some "classic" series (Twilight Zone, Magnum PI, Cheers, M*A*S*H, etc.). The only "new" series I would think merits inclusion is the compelling Mad Men.

What's missing? Agree or disagree? What are the best episodes? Whatcha think, TNRLM readers?

Friday Morning Entertainment News Roundup

Posting has been light lately, because I've been traveling like a mad man (shades of Don Draper, though sadly without the hot wife, hot mistresses and lunchtime whiskey, but with the marketing strategy and Marlboros).

Now I'm packing for another epic clash Between The Hedges in the Deep South's Oldest Football Rivalry. Should be a good one. As I mentioned in some pregame communications with The Freebird, I'm not sure what Coach Richt will have planned as a motivational tactic this week. The players have called for a "blackout" (which is fine with me, given the abundance of my favorite color in UGA togs) and there's the rumor of the Dawgs breaking out black jerseys. Short of a goal line player celebration after the first score, perhaps CMR will suggest that all the fans in black run out to the 50 yard line after our first score and do a synchronized version of the "Soulja Boy." Would that be more than 30 yards in penalties?

That said, here are a few entertainment nuggets I came across during the last week on the road:

The JJ Abrams Star Trek movie has offered some inspired casting thus far (Sylar as Spock? Shaun of the Dead as Scotty? Magnificent! Eomer as Bones McCoy? Not so sure). But two recent additions get a total A+ in my book. First, it was announced that under the radar total hottie and TNRLM Top 5-er Rachel Nichols had been cast. Rachel was on Tim Minear's quickly killed by FOX crime drama The Inside, and also appeared on the disjointed final season of Alias. Her role is uncertain, but anything is fine with me and almost makes me long for the 60s wardrobe of miniskirts and gogo boots on Starfleet vessels. Then today I read that longtime TNRLM Number One Winona Ryder has also signed on to play Spock's mom. There have been numerous hotties to grace the small screen on various incarnations of Trek, but with the exceptions of a pre-batshit Kirstie Alley as Saavik and Dina Meyer as a Romulan commander, not so much on the big screen. Nice to see this changing.

Nice interview with Jane Espenson, a fantastic writer who has worked on some of my favorite shows, including Firefly, Buffy, Angel, Star Trek: DS9, BSG and the late, lamented Andy Barker PI.

Those BSG "webisodes" (part of the reason for the much deserved writer's strike) have been awesome. How great was the old school toaster? Coming Monday? Lost webisodes.

Finally! A decent Heroes. I'm not sure that Monday's fantastic episode is enough to save the first part of this season from mediocrity, but it certainly held promise. At least the showrunner realizes that things thus far have sucked.

Speaking of the strike, the worst part of this by far will be the proliferation of the plague on mankind known as "reality" TV. The only reality show I've ever added to the Tivo is American Idol. And then, I generally fast forward through all the insipid "personal stories" and Seacrest nonsense, just to see the top 12 perform. With all those hours to fill now that carefully crafted and skillfully acted shows will be without their words, expect the AI juggernaut to fill up virtually every night with the "backstories." Many pundits also criticized AI last year for not delving enough into this. Ye gods. Thank Zeus that by the time Idol rolls around next year, I'll happily be free of the Comcast Ti-Faux DVR and back with my beloved original recipe Tivo in order to zoom through this steaming pile of crap.

Okay, enough for now. Off to pack several black shirts and brush up on my dance moves.

What if Clarice Starling was younger, hotter and spunkier?

Remember last television season, when there were rumors about producer Rob Thomas making a last ditch attempt to save the remnants of beloved cult favorite Veronica Mars by "flash forwarding" the story of our quippy detective a few years into the future, where she was a newbie with the FBI? He shot an extended length "trailer" showing just what this new show might be like, and thanks to the miracle of the interwebs, it has surfaced. Here you can view just what might have been:

Part 1



Part 2



No, we didn't see Keith, Wallace, Mac, Logan, Dick or Weevil. However, I thought this looked good, and would have gladly added "Veronica Mars, FBI" to my season pass list. Of course, I'd probably tune in to watch "Veronica Mars Stands in Line at the DMV." After all, I'm still watching "Veronica Mars has Gwen Raiden Electro-Powers and Follows Memory Wiped Peter Around a Full of Blarney Sub-Plot While the Rest of a Once Entertaining Show (Except HRG) Sinks Like a Fucking Stone."

Speaking of The CW, I've finally caught up on all the episodes of Reaper. My cumulative grade? B-. Obviously, Ray Wise is the main draw here and should deserve consideration for a Best Supporting Emmy when nominations roll around next year. The premise and set up is amusing, and Wise simply owns every single scene he's in as The Devil. The rest of the cast is solid enough, but with the exceptions of the pilot and last week's Halloween ep, the show's writing has been formulaic and the plots just redundant and recycled. Still, there's potential here and it's a pleasant enough diversion from the rest of the disappointment cluttering the screen these days (see show that has added Kristen Bell above).

Saturday Morning Entertainment Potpourri!

Rescue Me's Dammit Janet! will be appearing on Lost next year.

The talented and adorable Kristen Bell makes her first appearance on Heroes Monday. Can she use all her charm to make me give a shit about Peter and the Lucky Charms gang? Perhaps. Check out a preview of her here.

Nine reasons to Love Mad Men from TV Guide, here. I've yet to watch the season finale, though my non-spoilery web-skimming indicates that it is fantastic -- though with a controversial plot element. Hmmm. That should be interesting.

More from TV Guide: notes about the debut of the 24 Season 7 trailer. After last season's colossal misfire, I'm hoping for a strong rebound. I posted my thoughts on how to "fix" things here. Doesn't sound like they really listened to me, but I am mildly intrigued. Billy Walsh/Wally Balls? Faux Kristen Chenowith's real life girlfriend as the Prez? Tony! Left wing nutjob though still adorable Janeane Garofalo? Will she and Chloe have a pout and snark-off? Doctor Phlox? Amateur poon-ographer Brent from Dirt? I'll check it out. Here's the countdown to the trailer premiere.

One of my pet peeves is mis-quoted movies. Here is a list of the most frequently mis-quoted quotes. And another one.

And you thought people were through debating whether or not Tony Soprano is dead? Think again. Apparently, David Chase made a comment about Gerry Torciano's whacking in the restaurant in front of Silvio, and that spurred another round of detailed analysis. Fascinating stuff.

I finally watched last Friday's premiere of Women's Murder Club. It played like a combination of Sex In The City and CSI, and was a decent enough way to pass an hour while drinking beer and eating pizza. I love Angie Harmon (my favorite Law and Order ADA) and Laura Harris is a long time celebrity crush, with absolutely perfect hair. As I watched the credit unroll, I was flabbergasted by the producers: James Patterson, the former adman turned novelist, who wrote books on which the show is based. Showrunners/writers Elizabeth Craft and Sarah Fain, former writers and story editors for Angel. Creepy daughter pimping loon Joe Simpson. Chubby Hollywood starlet-banging playa and hack director Brett Ratner. Did the latter two hatch this idea when they were sitting around Brett's hot tub talking about Jessica's tits? Just bizarre. Still, I like the cast and I'll always give a shot to any show featuring former Whedon writers.

I'm a psychotic stripper with mutliple personality disorder.

Hey, at least that's better than almost marrying one. The stripper in question is Niki, from Heroes. What I found out: "You have two distinct personalities, and at least one capable of superhuman feats. It's up to you to be a strong hero 100% of the time." Wanna find out what "Hero" you are? Then check out this quiz at EW.

Women rejoice. Here's a history of the vibrator over on Slate. And men? This is why you're good for mainly taking out the trash, cutting the lawn and depositing checks.

Here is a guide to Mad Men's New York.

Fun radio interview with Bionic Woman and Battlestar Galactica badass Katee Sackhoff.

Posting was light this week due to heavy travel and the fact that I got typhoid from a Southwest flight filled with urchins and discount travelers. Is there an airline for people who don't spawn? With free drinks, R-rated movies on the overhead monitors (Fight Club on East to West flights!) and rampant profanity from the captain and flight crew? ("Put your fucking tray tables up, asshats!" "This is the captain. We'll be hitting some goddamned turbulence soon, so hold on. And no need to make small talk with the vapid shitbag sitting beside you. They probably don't like you either.") I'd sign up for some frequent flyer miles. This weekend, I'll expand more on last Saturday's Gameday Experience, assuming I can find a way to mix Alka Seltzer Cold and Flu with Ketel One.

Season Premieres and Entertainment Nuggets

Fall TV season has started, and here are a few initial thoughts:

I watched the premiere of Chuck (one of my "others to watch" recommendations) and was entertained. They didn't exaggerate the "nerd" angle to the annoying degree that the CBS comedy Big Bang Theory did. (I only caught about half of that, and while it elicited a few chuckles, it was far too broad and didn't seem interested in servicing the characters. "Klingon Boggle" made me laugh, though). The central character, Chuck, was likable and it sets up a decent enough premise. Chuck's sister was sweet, and her boyfriend, Captain Awesome, was well, awesome. And it's always good to see Jayne on the TV. I'll watch again.

I finally caught up on the first three episodes of Torchwood. I guess the fact that I watched them all back to back would signal that I'm on board with this English X-Files. Captain Jack isn't quite as devil may care and insouciant as he is on his Doctor Who appearances, but the plots move along nicely and I'm oddly attracted to the main detective despite the Letterman like gap in her teeth.

The returning shows were solid, if not spectacular. Heroes opened up a whole new can of issues for our genetically altered protagonists, but maybe I've fallen prey to overhype. I enjoyed the hour, but wasn't quite as smitten as I was last year. Maybe it was the lackluster season finale. Maybe I'm looking forward to Kristen Bell's appearance or Sylar's return. But the only standout moments in my book were HRG's approach to "manager management" at the copy store and David Anders' drunken turn as Hiro's hero, Kensai.

Shark is still an entertaining procedural, and Kevin Pollak (as the new DA) does sleazy and condescending well. Several Whodats from Sunday's premiere (in addition to Lt. Weinberg): character actor Dakin Matthews was the judge, and I recognized him as the headmaster of Rory's prep school on Gilmore Girls. Arnold Vosloo was the Russian mobster, and is best known as The Mummy. Kevin Alejandro is the new DA, and he was the bad seed brother on Fox's dear, departed Drive.

Bones also had a nice return to the air. It was good to see Patricia Belcher as the fiesty US Attorney, and Zack and Hodgins both had much needed haircuts. Angela's vacations sound fun, too, if a little complicated.

Mandy Moore was fun as a tatooed tart on How I Met Your Mother, where the show was once again stolen by Barney.

The best return I've seen this season was on House. Oh how I've missed your snark, Dr. House. The case was intriguing and I didn't figure it out until the end, which is always nice. But the good doctor had too many great lines to write down. Perhaps the best laugh out loud moment was "Dr. Buffer" suggesting "lupus." I didn't really miss the rest of House's team.

Great News: Mad Men has been renewed for another season!

Sad News: the rumors about Jan and Marcia having a lesbian fling don't appear to be true.

Morning Geeky News

Tim Minear will be doing a new show for Fox Studios for the ABC network. Sounds similar in theme to the quickly cancelled show Miracles (whose cleverest conceit was the right there in front of your face but basically unnoticed "God is Nowhere" / "God is Now Here" storyline), which ironically, was from another Buffyverse vet David Greenwalt. Click here to read more about what quirkly, quality show will be killed in 4 to 6 episodes. (And yes, those Minear/Fox/Dushku/"Faith" suggestions just seemed way to good to be true).

Speaking of Faith, here's a blurb at TV Guide about the upcoming Faith arc in the Season 8 Buffy comics. If you're not reading these, you're truly missing out on a spectactular tale well told. Get thee to the Dark Horse site for a subscription, or maybe you can see this guy.

You can vote on the cover of the Battlestar Galactica "Razor" DVD cover, and be rewarded with a clip of the uber-awesome Michelle Forbes as Admiral Helena Cain explaining the film's title. For the record, A. I think she has some solid advice. I'm pulling out the sharpening stone, and B. I voted for the third one, which captures the fractious nature of the situation visually.

Not only is she talented, funny and hot -- Kristen Bell is geeky and humble too. See what I mean here at EW.

Speaking of talented, geeky, funny and humble, here's a good interview with Nathan Fillion answering fan submitted questions. (Although I'm sure Captain Tightpants is considered "hot," too, I'll leave that judgment to the female TNRLM readers. And Republican congressmen). Bonus points for Nathan loving Arrested Development, as should anyone with a modicum of taste, discretion and humor.

Snootchie Bootches, Cylon motherfuckers

Holy shit. Kevin Smith is completing a geek TV trifecta. First, we learned he has directed the pilot of the new CW series Reaper. Then, he's going to write and direct an episode of Heroes: Origins. And now for the capper: Silent Bob himself will direct an episode of the final season of The.Best.Show.On.TV, Battlestar Galactica.

You can read all about his involvement with those three shows in this interview with AOL Television.

He's obviously humbled by the opportunity, and clearly recognizes that BSG rocks. He's not writing the show he's directing, or we might see dialogue like this:

Baltar, about Gaeta: ....Just for the record, I'm not gay, but my tubby man servant....he loves the cock..."

Anders to Tyrol: "There's a million fine looking women in the world, dude. But they don't all bring you lasagna at work. Most of 'em just cheat on you."

Gaius Baltar: "In a world gone mad, we will not spank the monkey, but the monkey will spank us. "

Saul Tigh, about the Cylons: "All you motherfuckers are gonna pay. You are the ones who are the ball-lickers. We're gonna fuck your mothers while you watch and cry like little bitches."

Lee: "Your shit is really getting tired, Kara."
Kara: "Call me 'Boo-Boo-Kitty-Fuck', bitch. "