Whereby we throw up a bunch of $1 entertainment nuggets onto the stage and see which STDs take them home.
Rosie O'Donnell is leaving The View. Now, they'll have to rely on Elisabeth Hasselbeck for cogent political commentary. And Donald Trump can focus on the dwindling ratings for his reality train wreck. An Rosie can work with Michael Moore and Oliver Stone on a movie about how the Illuminati, the Shriners, George Bush and David Stern (and his frozen envelope) were responsible for 9/11, Sanjaya and a faked moon landing.
Heather Mills and her leg got "booted" from Dancing with the Stars. Poor thing. Now she'll just have to worry about scraping by on the royalties from Sgt. Pepper. Which I've heard that she didn't write or sing on, either. Weird how that works.
The unevenly hysterical Robot Chicken is taking on Star Wars. With the blessing of the big kahuna himself.
Some 18 year old single mother named "Asia" will now take her place of honor alongside the other role models for for today's young women as the next "Pussycat Doll." That's just fantastic. I'm sure her kid will be so proud, and use her as a reference when she takes the pole in a few years. The silver lining to this whoreathon being over? Veronica Mars returns next week!
Is there something on the Lifetime network that I would watch? Possibly so.
Showing posts with label Making It Rain. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Making It Rain. Show all posts
Wednesday, April 25, 2007
Thursday, April 19, 2007
Making it rain: Lost, House, Idol and More!
Whereby we throw up a bunch of $1 entertainment nuggets onto the stage and see which STDs take them home.
House
Tuesday's House was one of the more interesting and humorous in a long time. The case itself was mildly interesting, but mostly this hour was about the complicated relationships going on within the walls of Princeton Plainsboro: Chase and Cameron, House and Wilson, Wilson and Cuddy, House and Cuddy, Cameron and a horny 8 year old. Jam packed with funny lines, like:
"You did not just play the 'dead husband' card..."
"It shouldn't be so hard."
"Just be straight with her."
"I have no idea how to do that."
"SERIOUSLY?" (That whole oft-repeated bit was hysterical)
"Do you have hair on your special place?"
"Delegating? That's smart."
"We're not his subordinates!"
"All the more impressive."
"How was the play, Mrs Lincoln?"
"Panty hamster"
"Okay, then why did you take her to a play?"
"She's a friend."
"Friend with a squish mitten."
Idol
The long national nightmare of Sanjaya is over, y'all. After drawing and quartering Bonnie Raitt on Tuesday, even the "Vote For The Worst" faction couldn't keep this charade going. (Although, I must admit that I wasn't completely heartless, and felt a little sad watching him lose it after getting the boot). From here on out, I'm fine with what happens, though I certainly hope Lakisha (she has a kid!) and Chris (Nasally is a style!) are the next to get a ciggie and blindfold. And I'm glad they took the time to explain the "Simon rolls his eyes" controversy. As he said, Simon may be a total ass, but he's certainly not going to mock the victims of a national tragedy. If you were a true cynic, you could have thought Chris calculatingly invoked the victims as a canny plea for votes, and that's what Simon was rolling his eyes over (yes, I thought that. But then again, I hoped the backlash over this would save us from more nasal boy band song stylings, too). Better to just let the whole thing drop, and keep our pop-culture froth free of meaning and import. Oh wait. Next week, we have to suffer through "Idol gives back" where the contestants sing "songs of hope" (I won't hold my breath for anything like "Highway to Hell" or "Have a Drink on Me") and endless goop that will probably better suited to a Jerry Lewis telethon. My fast-forward finger is already limbering up.
Lost
Last night's Desmond-centric episode of Lost was yet another solid installment of a rejuvenated franchise. While not totally mind-blowing as the past few eps, I always welcome learning more about Desmond, and his doomed, Odysseus-like journey away from his beautiful true love Penny. I could care less about Kate's feelings for Jack, but I do appreciate Sawyer's "hey, I'm gonna get laid" take on the quadrangle. And as usual, he gets all the best lines:
"Do I need to make you a mix tape?"
"You two arguing over who's your favorite Other?"
"We don't play every 108 minutes, the island's gonna explode."
Hurley and Charlie's bit about the race between Flash and Superman (a race for charity? Hee. Maybe they could get Ryan Seacrest to host, and give back) does deserve some props, too.
Miscellaneous
Great article on the under appreciated How I Met Your Mother, here. I cannot fathom why this show doesn't draw more viewers. It's smart, funny, well-written, well-acted. Of course, we also live in a TV world where Lost is losing viewers, and shows like Drive, Andy Barker PI, Raines and Veronica Mars struggle to find an audience. Yet the search for the next Pussycat Whore is considered a "hit." The mind boggles.
Speaking of Andy Barker, here's a good "eulogy" for the best sitcom since Arrested Development.
And speaking of the talented "singers" and female role models (cough, cough) peddling their wares on the CW, here's a fantastic article on their cultural significance. Excellent analysis and prose, and any article that coins the phrase "Generation Whoring Sea Donkey" is worth a careful read. (Note: it's in Salon, which means it's subscriber-only, or you'll have to watch a brief ad. So turn off your adblock for this. It's worth it).
House
Tuesday's House was one of the more interesting and humorous in a long time. The case itself was mildly interesting, but mostly this hour was about the complicated relationships going on within the walls of Princeton Plainsboro: Chase and Cameron, House and Wilson, Wilson and Cuddy, House and Cuddy, Cameron and a horny 8 year old. Jam packed with funny lines, like:
"You did not just play the 'dead husband' card..."
"It shouldn't be so hard."
"Just be straight with her."
"I have no idea how to do that."
"SERIOUSLY?" (That whole oft-repeated bit was hysterical)
"Do you have hair on your special place?"
"Delegating? That's smart."
"We're not his subordinates!"
"All the more impressive."
"How was the play, Mrs Lincoln?"
"Panty hamster"
"Okay, then why did you take her to a play?"
"She's a friend."
"Friend with a squish mitten."
Idol
The long national nightmare of Sanjaya is over, y'all. After drawing and quartering Bonnie Raitt on Tuesday, even the "Vote For The Worst" faction couldn't keep this charade going. (Although, I must admit that I wasn't completely heartless, and felt a little sad watching him lose it after getting the boot). From here on out, I'm fine with what happens, though I certainly hope Lakisha (she has a kid!) and Chris (Nasally is a style!) are the next to get a ciggie and blindfold. And I'm glad they took the time to explain the "Simon rolls his eyes" controversy. As he said, Simon may be a total ass, but he's certainly not going to mock the victims of a national tragedy. If you were a true cynic, you could have thought Chris calculatingly invoked the victims as a canny plea for votes, and that's what Simon was rolling his eyes over (yes, I thought that. But then again, I hoped the backlash over this would save us from more nasal boy band song stylings, too). Better to just let the whole thing drop, and keep our pop-culture froth free of meaning and import. Oh wait. Next week, we have to suffer through "Idol gives back" where the contestants sing "songs of hope" (I won't hold my breath for anything like "Highway to Hell" or "Have a Drink on Me") and endless goop that will probably better suited to a Jerry Lewis telethon. My fast-forward finger is already limbering up.
Lost
Last night's Desmond-centric episode of Lost was yet another solid installment of a rejuvenated franchise. While not totally mind-blowing as the past few eps, I always welcome learning more about Desmond, and his doomed, Odysseus-like journey away from his beautiful true love Penny. I could care less about Kate's feelings for Jack, but I do appreciate Sawyer's "hey, I'm gonna get laid" take on the quadrangle. And as usual, he gets all the best lines:
"Do I need to make you a mix tape?"
"You two arguing over who's your favorite Other?"
"We don't play every 108 minutes, the island's gonna explode."
Hurley and Charlie's bit about the race between Flash and Superman (a race for charity? Hee. Maybe they could get Ryan Seacrest to host, and give back) does deserve some props, too.
Miscellaneous
Great article on the under appreciated How I Met Your Mother, here. I cannot fathom why this show doesn't draw more viewers. It's smart, funny, well-written, well-acted. Of course, we also live in a TV world where Lost is losing viewers, and shows like Drive, Andy Barker PI, Raines and Veronica Mars struggle to find an audience. Yet the search for the next Pussycat Whore is considered a "hit." The mind boggles.
Speaking of Andy Barker, here's a good "eulogy" for the best sitcom since Arrested Development.
And speaking of the talented "singers" and female role models (cough, cough) peddling their wares on the CW, here's a fantastic article on their cultural significance. Excellent analysis and prose, and any article that coins the phrase "Generation Whoring Sea Donkey" is worth a careful read. (Note: it's in Salon, which means it's subscriber-only, or you'll have to watch a brief ad. So turn off your adblock for this. It's worth it).
Wednesday, March 28, 2007
Making it rain
Whereby we throw up a bunch of $1 entertainment nuggets onto the stage and see which STDs take them home.
Great article on John Locke, the "heart" of Lost, here. Last week's episode was a classic and among the best of the series. Of course, tonight, we have to deal with Nicki and Paulo. (In case you're wondering, like many other faithful viewers, that would be "and who are you?" and "I like to poop.") On the bright side, I think Artz ("uh, dude, you've got some Artz on you") shows up again, along with Boone and Shannon.
Not entertainment exactly, but a very funny parody of the Pac-Man Jones situation over on Deadspin.
Please make this happen. I'd be willing to forget all about the confusing and wouldn't make sense after a peyote and blotter acid bender alien conspiracy plotline.
Teen movie or biblical epic? Doesn't matter, because this is funny.
Thora Birch's dad is fucked up. If that acting thing doesn't work out, she'll probably become a stripper.
MNF fans rejoice. College football fans shudder in terror.
Great article on John Locke, the "heart" of Lost, here. Last week's episode was a classic and among the best of the series. Of course, tonight, we have to deal with Nicki and Paulo. (In case you're wondering, like many other faithful viewers, that would be "and who are you?" and "I like to poop.") On the bright side, I think Artz ("uh, dude, you've got some Artz on you") shows up again, along with Boone and Shannon.
Not entertainment exactly, but a very funny parody of the Pac-Man Jones situation over on Deadspin.
Please make this happen. I'd be willing to forget all about the confusing and wouldn't make sense after a peyote and blotter acid bender alien conspiracy plotline.
Teen movie or biblical epic? Doesn't matter, because this is funny.
Thora Birch's dad is fucked up. If that acting thing doesn't work out, she'll probably become a stripper.
MNF fans rejoice. College football fans shudder in terror.
Wednesday, March 7, 2007
Making it rain, entertainment style
Whereby we throw a bunch of $1 entertainment nuggets up onto the stage and see which STDs take them home.
This sounds like a great show concept. The delicious Lauren Ambrose and the quirkily hot Parker Posey? Written by pop-culture dialogue savant Amy Sherman Palladino? Except for one thing. Why does there need to be a kid or a pregnancy "hook" in the show? Isn't it enough to have too smart and funny to be real people saying smart and funny things? Why add this baggage of spawn? If I think about the best shows on TV (BSG, Veronica, 24, Dexter, Rescue Me, Heroes, etc.) there's hardly a baby in the bunch. (I realize there's "miracle baby" Hera on BSG, which at least serves as a plot point. But every time I see Chief and Cally's reproductive discharge, my eyes roll back in my head and I reach for the FF button. Same with Claire's offspring on Lost. And don't get me started on the beginning of the season on Scrubs). And it's not like ASP didn't already wreck one show with shenanigans involving a kid. (I'm looking at you, April. At least that show's finally starting to rebound after digging out of last season's plot grave). I'll probably tune in, but hopefully Tivo will invent some type of child filter before then.
A very good House last night. I love it when touching sentimentality (House has cancer!) gets turned around to self-absorbed, cynical narcissism, complete with a Cuddy ass-grab. And Dave Mattews, stoner icon to millions, did a fine job playing a piano savant with the IQ of most of his fans. And bonus for Red Foreman/Clarence Boddiker as the concerned dad.
Cruel and unusual punishment: no Heroes until April 23rd? WTF?
Spoiler whore that I am, I've read some things about the final episodes of BSG. If they're true, then we're in store for a mind-frak rivaling that of last season's finale. Of the "four things" purported to be true, all make "sense" except for one -- which would be staggering. Not a spoiler: Firefly's "Badger" shows up as Baltar's attorney.
Given some "local" gossip I've heard lately, this headline made me laugh. Despite the author's take on Liz, I do find her attractive and she was amusing enough in Austin Powers. Though she was booted from school for poor grades, I doubt she's ever reached the "pinnacle" of her "career" in the champagne room, conceived in a car, bought dope from her kids' grandmother or shagged roughly the population of Kuala Lumpur.
Happy 10th Anniversary Buffy! Too bad I don't live in Texas.
Speaking of the Whedonverse, Summer Glau will be a teriminatrix.
The official Drive site is up and running.
It's well known that I'm a geek, and I've professed my love for Trek many times. However, I don't think I'll be doing any remodeling any time soon. (And to pick a "Voyager" theme? Not unless there's a 7 of 9 component in the boudoir).
This sounds like a great show concept. The delicious Lauren Ambrose and the quirkily hot Parker Posey? Written by pop-culture dialogue savant Amy Sherman Palladino? Except for one thing. Why does there need to be a kid or a pregnancy "hook" in the show? Isn't it enough to have too smart and funny to be real people saying smart and funny things? Why add this baggage of spawn? If I think about the best shows on TV (BSG, Veronica, 24, Dexter, Rescue Me, Heroes, etc.) there's hardly a baby in the bunch. (I realize there's "miracle baby" Hera on BSG, which at least serves as a plot point. But every time I see Chief and Cally's reproductive discharge, my eyes roll back in my head and I reach for the FF button. Same with Claire's offspring on Lost. And don't get me started on the beginning of the season on Scrubs). And it's not like ASP didn't already wreck one show with shenanigans involving a kid. (I'm looking at you, April. At least that show's finally starting to rebound after digging out of last season's plot grave). I'll probably tune in, but hopefully Tivo will invent some type of child filter before then.
A very good House last night. I love it when touching sentimentality (House has cancer!) gets turned around to self-absorbed, cynical narcissism, complete with a Cuddy ass-grab. And Dave Mattews, stoner icon to millions, did a fine job playing a piano savant with the IQ of most of his fans. And bonus for Red Foreman/Clarence Boddiker as the concerned dad.
Cruel and unusual punishment: no Heroes until April 23rd? WTF?
Spoiler whore that I am, I've read some things about the final episodes of BSG. If they're true, then we're in store for a mind-frak rivaling that of last season's finale. Of the "four things" purported to be true, all make "sense" except for one -- which would be staggering. Not a spoiler: Firefly's "Badger" shows up as Baltar's attorney.
Given some "local" gossip I've heard lately, this headline made me laugh. Despite the author's take on Liz, I do find her attractive and she was amusing enough in Austin Powers. Though she was booted from school for poor grades, I doubt she's ever reached the "pinnacle" of her "career" in the champagne room, conceived in a car, bought dope from her kids' grandmother or shagged roughly the population of Kuala Lumpur.
Happy 10th Anniversary Buffy! Too bad I don't live in Texas.
Speaking of the Whedonverse, Summer Glau will be a teriminatrix.
The official Drive site is up and running.
It's well known that I'm a geek, and I've professed my love for Trek many times. However, I don't think I'll be doing any remodeling any time soon. (And to pick a "Voyager" theme? Not unless there's a 7 of 9 component in the boudoir).
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