Sunday, October 26, 2008

Who would be that stupid?

By now, I'm sure everyone has heard the story of one Ashley Todd, the 20 year old who claimed she was attacked by a 6'4" black man, who became so enraged that she had a McCain/Palin bumper sticker on her car, that he robbed her at an ATM and carved a backwards 'B' on her face.

Many things in the story didn't make sense. Why didn't she call police immediately? Why did she wait 45 minutes to report the attack, from a friend's apartment? If she's standing at an ATM, why would the robber only take $60? Why would the attacker be looking at bumper stickers, and how would he know that the car featuring the GOP sticker was hers? Why would he carve a 'B' on her face (presumably for 'Barack') instead of an 'O?' Isn't an 'O' easier to carve than a 'B?' Wouldn't a 'B' be just about the toughest letter to carve in the whole damned alphabet? Why did he carve it backwards? Was he behind her, dragging her to the nearest storefront mirror to do his carving, and didn't realize the letter wasn't facing the right way (see, if he had carved an 'O,' he could have avoided the whole backwards letter thing). Do most committed ATM robbers/political assailants only carry dull knives? And if the attacker, supposedly an Obama supporter, really wanted to hurt the McCain fan, couldn't he have just waited a couple of months until his candidate's tax policies went into effect, and dimwitted Ashley went back to that ATM only to find that all her money had already been siphoned off to the federal government?

Obviously, the story was exposed as a complete and total fraud. But who would be STUPID enough to think that this whole charade would fly, even for a minute? Who could possibly be that monumentally IDIOTIC?

As they say, every picture tells a story:


With a sweatshirt like that, you don't even need a caption. Oh, I get it.

On a related note, the Tide rolls in Knox-Vegas. Was that the Great Pumpkin's last game in the rivalry? (Note: 5XL sweatervest not included in crime fabrication kit).

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