Tuesday, January 8, 2008

We're Number One! We're Number One!


No, there wasn't an uprising by the AP voters to declare UGA number one this year. The Dawgs did finish two in the AP (deservedly so) and three in the coaches poll (debatably so). While there wasn't enough evidence to put USC or UGA atop the AP poll (loss to 41 point underdog Standford, ass-whipping by the accursed Vols, respectively), I'm fine with LSU, even with two losses, being the mythical champ this year. They legitimately won the World's Best Football Conference, their two losses were both in triple overtime, and they continued the honorable and amusing postseason tradition of exsanguinating THE Ohio State University.

What I'm talking about is NEXT year. Barring any preseason keg lifting incidents or hookups with women of questionable moral and medical composition (stay away from Columbus, Matt!), or freakish Soula Boy knee twisting dancing accidents, the Dawgs should come back in the fall loaded, hungry and inspired. And enter the season ranked extraordinarily high. Number One high, in fact.

No less than noted UGA backer (cough, cough) Stewart Mandel of SI has proclaimed the Bulldogs his preseason poll topper.

I just saw on ESPN (home of "oh wait, there's a college football team in Athens?") that Todd McShay has put the Canines number one on his 2008 list.

College football historian and all around southern gentleman Tony Barnhart also says the Dawgs are number one.

However, on that same SportsCenter with McShay, doddering doofus Lee Corso (he of the "Buckeye Head" last night) put UGA number five. Not this year. Number five for next year. Herbstreit put us number two, behind USC (although he did say that the top three were really a toss up). I didn't see any comments from Mark May, though I'm sure he has us just outside the Top 25.*

Of course, we all know how much preseason chatter and rankings really means when the first whistle blows (off the top of my head, I think about the Tigers/War Eagles/Plainsmen traveling to The Coliseum, or Appy State visiting the Big House). But this is the first time in my post-graduate life where I can honestly say (and not just in the tiny, hopeful, deluded fan voice within) that we have a damned good shot at the mythical national championship. And certainly the first time when I can honestly say that I expect a damned good shot at the MNC.

One thing we can be sure of, to paraphrase legendary Larry Munson, is that there sure is gonna be some property destroyed "tonight" after the Cocktail Party. The world should hang in the balance with that game. (That is, unless the world is hanging in the balance the previous week, when we visit the defending National Champions, and all the property in North America is destroyed that week. Either way, I think there will be some property destroyed late October / Early November).

*Where in Bristol do we have to send a squadron of top flight hookers to get a little love and respect from the World Wide Leader? There's no way the regular reach-arounds for Pete Carroll and his merry band of prophylactics will stop anytime soon, but the Dawgs typically get mentioned on ESPNs various programs about as often tax cuts do at the DNC. Will they still ignore us every week if we're ranked number one heading into next season, or will we still be on "upset alert" every goddamned weekend?

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